Fianl draft- the emotional dissapearnace (2nd piece) Gabrielle Carter

The Emotional Dissapearnace

Gabrielle Carter

1st Block

“I don’t understand how this can happen to me.” I stand in the middle of my treehouse floor staring up at the ceiling. Tears drip from my face and wet my nose and for a moment I wish everything was simple. “Penny darling are you there?”I sniff one more time and bite my lip. TO my surprise my mom is sitting on the treehouse stairs watching me. As I descend the wooden stairs, the sky opens and I feel my body getting soaked from the rain. Grabbing me, my mom pulls me to the patio shielding me from life and sorrow. ‘hey mom.” My mom puts her haand to her mouth and shhs me. Then she hands me the phone. “Hey penny it’s Rosin.” At the mention of her name I feel my throat clench up and suddenly I cannot breath. I drop the cellphone on the floor and dash to my room, leaving everything behind.

 She was calling to apologize. The idea rushes over me like a steam truck rolling over fresh cement. How could I not forgive her? The incident happened weeks ago. Suddenly, I hear a knock on the door and I am afraid it is my mom. And it is, only she doesn’t look angry. Instead she crumples how long day gown and ruffles the sheets on my bed, and plops down. I expect her to lecture me about how much her iphone costs but instead she wraps me in a hug. I smell her vanilla and I weep. Crying until her shoulder is wet, then when she gets up to leave, I open my journal and I write.

  Memories. When we were first born, still bloody and wet from the womb, My mom said Rosin and I gave each other high fives. From that moment on, We grew together like peas in a pod. Our favorite passtime was indulging ourselves in Nancy drew novels. THe mystery and adventure transforme us to a new world and got both of us through the first years of high school. In middle school we split and left our little pods. Sh went to North SCHWAZER and I went to SOuth SHWZER Then in 8th grade majic happen. Rosin magically appeared at my school. lighting up my year.That year we moved from books to asking question. WHy ddi water flow forward? WHy did birds fly North? WHy did toilets flush (don’t ask how that one turned out)? What I don’t understand is how Rosin can take all of those golden memories and flush them down the toilet. Here is how it went down.

It was October 2 and like a normal morning I rode the giant catepillar bus. The bus had to be 30 feet long and had loopy words that had to be scribbled on by a drunk santa. It was called the catepillar because as it scooted down the street jt bounced up and down like a catepillar on stilts.As usual, I climb on the bus and about to sit next to Rosin when I notice a short kid with reddish orange hair silky brown eyes and lips that were gone, becaus ehe was kissing my best friend. In other words Rosin wa kissing my crush Ian. Lip to lip and everything. I bet she enjoyed the feeling of her tounge on his teeth. I don’t feel my legs as I settle into a seat next to Caligha the national booger picker of our grade. Sometimes I wonder if she digs so far she feels her nose bleeding. For two days I avoided Rosin. At lunch, in the class, and even in carr-iders. I began to notice changes too. Where as before Rosin would wrap me in a hug, each time our eyes met I saw a coldness that was there and then flickered away like a candle light being blown out. I also noticed that her and Ethan were hanging out more holding hands in the hallway. It irked me even though I knew I should be happy for my best friend.

One day, when I came home to my treehouse I found a note tucked under the box with my old weathered magazines stuffed inside. “Call me I just want to say sorry and I hope there are no hard feelings.” 2 days later I found her standing in the same place.

As Rosin sat down on a milk crate I felt my heart drop. “Why are you here I thought you and Ethan were so buddy buddy that you didn’t need me anymore.” Rosin sighed and tucked her hands in her pockets. “I’m so sorry.” I ignore the apology. “You KNEW I liked him Rosin, I talked about him all the time.” To my surprise, ROsin leaned forward and breathed a deep breath. “Penny, why are you acting like such a nut lately?” My temperature rose like a kitchen stove. “WHat do you mean? You stole my crush” “No I didn’t he was available.” For 30 minutes we argued until our voices were hoarse. I didn’t even say goodbye as Rosin jumped off the ladder of my treehouse, grabbed her bike, and flicked me off.

     Current

“Hey are you OK?” It takes me a minute to realize that I am at Pine Gates middle school. My friend Anna is holding my arm and shaking me. I shrug my shoulders and turn to open my locker. Then, from my left ear I hear it, a snicker. I turn my lock 3 times but it doesn’t open. The snickers get louder.I whip around to see the princess crew and Rosin. My heart breaks audibly. “Rosin you promised me>” i yell to Rosin. “You promised you would never do this.” But Rosin just sniffs and turns on her heels leaving me alone to bang on the locker. I feel Anna pulling my arm. “DO you want me to get Mr Mack?” “NO!!! it’s cool just leave me alone.” Sulkily, Anna gives me a fistbump and heads to class. I sigh and sink to the gritty floor. I feel like I am going to die, when a voice calls to me “Hey what’s up?” I look up to see a handsome kid holding a bible and a giant book-bag that balances well with his relaxed outfit. “I can’t open my locker.” I show him my battle scars 4 red spots the size of 4 quarters. Sneezing SMith turns my locker thing one time and it pops open.

You know those super religious kids who walk around carrying bibles? Smith is one of those. A hard core bile kid and is always either arguing about the bible or singing Hallelujah in his tenor voice. Today, as we stand at the locker, he seems normal. “Look, I know there is something going on between you and Rosin, but it’s ok.” He grabs my hand and squeezes it. Then he turns on his hall and walks away.

The rest of the day it feels like my head is stuck in a giant tub of marshmallow fluff. If a brick fell on my head I feel as though it would have shrunk due to the sheer negativity. So when the school bell rings the noise is a relief. For a moment I see the sun peeking out from its hiding place. That is, until I get to the bus. Today the bus is crammed. Rosin doesn’t even cross my mind as I stand next to Smith. As usual he is arguing about the bible says “No Corinthians says this not that.”He picks up his bible to quote it, but stops abruptly when he sees me.Time is frozen in his clear green eyes. I hear someone call “What’s up with you and
Rosin?” but before I can answer Smith pulls me into the bus seat and crams a piece of paper in my hands. I want to ask what it is but i notice a  red blush creeping up into his shirt neck. Once Smith goes from the bus I open the crumpled piece of paper. On it is his number.

Home

I walk into my house to see my mom and my baby sister doing the downward dog stretch in front of the TV. A lonely candle stands next to Towa, and afraid she will get burnt, I move the candle to the kitchen counter. Taking a deep breath, I relax into the couch. “Hey mom do you know this kid named SMith Keener?” My mom jumps up so fast I am afraid that she will knock the fish reef off the wall.” “Yeah Smith’s moms work at my job.” I almost double over. “Wait Smith’s parents are gay? I thought that was against his christianity.” Suddenly, my little brother bursts into the door. His knee is skinned and dirt layers his blonde hair. “Guess what mom! I got an A!” My mom leaps up from the kitchen stool and rushes over to him, obviously finished with the downward dog stretch. My brother has severe ADD and getting him to focus is like teaching a dog not to bark, hard and frustrating. A lot of times, I find him holed up in his room playing with his stuffed monkey Cornelius, a stark contrast to many 13 year olds.

 Uninterested, I walk outside and into the treehouse. I am so deep in thought that I do not notice a small note “Forgive me or you will be sorry.”The paper flutters to the ground and is trampled under my feet. “

BAM CRASH BOOM The rain bounces off my window like ping pong balls in a machine. “WHy did he give you his number?” I lay on my bed thinking and texting Anna. “I don’t know, that is what I am trying to figure out.” I look at the damp pper and sigh. “I know why it was because of Rosin, today I could not open my locker and he saved my butt.” At the mention of Rosin, a loud burst of thunder shakes the house. My window panes begin to flutter and just like that the power is out. Outside, the lonely paper floated through the wind like a bird.

  Next day

“Well look at you ,Penny, Looks like Rosin isn’t here to save you.” I feel my back pushing up against the locker, the lock stabbing me like a knife. Shark girl grabs my collar, and just when I think I am going to die, Max, the same guy who asked me and Rosin on the bus the other day, rams into Shark girl the result is epic. That is all I see as I dash to class sweating and hot.

“Hey can I sit next to you?” I look up from deep thought to see Smith his long hair curled and beautiful. I suddenly wonder why my temperature has skyrocketed. All period we avert eyes and Smith doesn’t talk to me until the end of class. He is out of breath and looks frantic as he pulls me to the side. :Rosin is gone.” I look around the hallway wondering if being seen with Smith the Goody 2 shoes would ruin my medium good rep. “WHat do you mean> SHe is right there.” Out of nowhere, is the shark crew prancing and giggling as usual comes up the hallway. ANd there I see the familiar mop of brunette hair. Then, by a strike of luck the girl turns her head. I am shocked. “Maria, the mathelete, and star reporter is in the Princess Crew?!” Smith must have known how distracted I was and he grabs me in a hug. It is so unexpected that I almost pee my pants. Then, with my head leaning on his shoulder he whispers “Call me tonight.”

 I do not clll. Tuesday night I sat in my treehouse smoking smarties and flipping through my rag tag crew of magazines. Thinking about how when Smith hugged me it made my fingers tingle. Wednesday I don’t bother. My mom has me watch my baby brother and sister and I have dinner duty. THen, thursday I got a call. THe three words uttered would change my life for good. “Turn on the TV.:

        Lights. Fire.Tears,On the Tv stands Phil the weatherman dressed in a yellow parka. It’s funny because the same guy who hopped up and down when the Mets won the world series, stands still as a coffin, as he says these words. “GIrl missing.”

Scrolling down at the bottom is the headline. Girl Missing house left in shambles. In the picture, is the yellow brick house on briggs road. The same house with 13 goldfish and the house that always smelled of pizza. The house where Rosin and I sat when we were 8, me crying over dad, Rosin hugging me. The same home now only a ghost of what was there before. “Rosin burned down her own house.” The thought makes me skin crawl. In front of the house stands Rosin’s mom. Her cool demeanor gone and replaced with the fragility of a 15 year old girl who gets teased at school and feels empty. Next to her stands the same guy who always baked cookies when we came over and though he was obsessed with work always had time to give me a hug.

“Hey are you still here?” I crash back into reality. “Yeah” Then I hang up. It is cold outside but I have no trouble slipping unto the sidewalk. My feet find their way to the brightly colored sign that reads SNiKZEN Diner. As I walk inside I grasp the familar smells and slight smell of oil. Cowetta, the super-intendent and head chef, stands at the counter mesmerized by the TV. However, it only takes a moment for Cowetta to dash from behind the counter and wrap me in a hug. It takes the same amount of time for the doorbell to ring. In enters Maria. “Hey dear, You know what you need? A chocolate milkshake.” Maria is talking to a dark haired boy with eyes the color of coals. I think his name is Mark but he is so silent he dissappers into the backdrop. A moment later I find myself in the booth right in front of them,listening to their hushed voices. I hear Mria leaning in. “I think I know where Rosin went. The other day before PE when we were dressing she said that she was running to.” “Penny here is your milkshake.” At this moment Cowetta comes rushing from the break room and sings the robust song she sings to every customer. Still, I am so surprised that I jump up from the table. I make the mistake of looking at Maria and I notice something. Her bubbliness are gone and her eyes are dead and cold looking. Without a piece of a goodbye I rush out of the diner.

I spend the rest of the night bawling my eyes out. How could I have missed those last words? My eyes slide to plastic, badly drawn maps ,we have placed all over the tree house using colored duct tape. Suddenly, I see a tiny star on the map it is in California. I quickly calculate the time in my head. California would be 12 hours away. Before I get any further, I realize something. Rosin would not go to where everyone else would be, she would go in the opposite direction.

School

School rushes by in a blur. Greens look like blues, hugs and stares are the ordinary, and suddenly I am popular. The worse part is that I can’t move my neck. I spent all last night searching the internet to see where my friend may have went. Then after about 30 minutes I fell asleep on the milk crates for fear of waking up my mom who would be angry as a devil if she found out that I was walking the streets late at night. Smith is even more bible based today and I notice that he stares at me for long durations of times and then looks away. However, as the clock struck time to go I grabbed Smiths arm and walked him to the bus. I had a very important to ask him about his parents and I think he would know the answer.

  “So are your parents gay?” “What?! Where did you hear that from?” SMith almost jumps out the bus seat. I look down at the ground and scrape my foot over a piece of gum. “I asked..” Smith looked at me and raised an eyebrow. We are silent the rest of the ride. But as he stood to go he looked at me and in a serious tone said “Call me tonight and I will tell you everything.”

So I did. In the quiet of my room when the clock strikes 10:00 I call. The voice that answers is a women’s voice clear as can be.I am so jittery that I almost hang up. The only remotely comfortable voice is Smith’s. “Penny this is Alyssa, my first mom. Alyssa meet Penny.” Somehow I get out a hello from my lips. His first mom sounded awesome and cool like Anna. The second voice enters the conversation. This one is slightly deeper but just as positive sounding. “Penny, this is my second mom, Jane.” A wave of nausea passes over me.The thought that a christian. Another wave of nausea attacks my stomach. Thankfully, the ladies voices disappear and with it the bile in my throat. “Don’t worry it’s weird but you will get used to them.” Then he launches into this long story of two crafter/entreprenuers who met and married after the grandfather of the child died. After story was done, I felt ok again. “SO I have one question what is it like living with two moms?” I hear Smith’s voice crack. “Well, what is it like living with a mom and a barely dad?” Touche. “SO tell me about your parents.” Smith asks. I begin to launch into the story of how my parents met but he stops me mid sentence. “No, what is your greatest fear.” I pause and look outside a the silver mom. “My greatest fear is losing my best friend.” And that’s how our call went.

2:00 AM

I wake up with a start to see my phone flashing. The screen reads Amber Alert and i sit up so fast that I almost fall off the bed. For in the picture is ROsin and she is headed for trouble.

                           

                                                                   Rosin

I really didn’t mean to break Penny’s heart. As I sit here, I wonder how I could have been such an awful friend. So maybe this is karma getting back at me for deserting my very best friend in the world. Maybe that’s why I ended up this stupid trunk, wrapped in a burlap sack and tied up into chains. For all I know, Penny could be looking for me and not ever find me. She could get lost. I try to break from my chains but the burlap sack is tying me down. I take out a pen from under the bags of marajuana and start to write

Dear Penny

I’m sorry for being such a bad friend

Suddenly the trunk opens and I become still as a piece of wood. For the first time I see my perpetrator he is tall and handsome and is dressed in a classy tan pantsuit and alligator skin dress up shoes.I take this moment to look around and that’s when it clicks we are the deserted mall in Vershell only 45 minutes from my house. I hear whispers about weed and money and trunk and the guy tries to come back to close the trunk but the man is speaking in Spanish betting more money to keep the turn open. As the guy who saves my butt leaves I focus on the real issue at hand.

As soon as they are disappear into the building I role over to my stomach and grab a pair of emergency wire cutters.it only takes a few swift cuts for them to fall to the ground. Like a smart person, I stuff the burlap sack with bags of money and the chains and then I  leave. It only take me 30 minutes to reach the barrier between trees and the city. Just when I’m home free a hand grabs me by the waist and covers my mouth.

Penny

I did not even think. Once I saw the Amber Alert I  pulled on my shoes grabbed my coat and dashed out to the car.  I was thinking so fast, I forgot that I didn’t know how to drive. It only takes a minute for the car to reach the deserted Industrial building. Then, I wait. Suddenly,like a gazelle leaping through the grass. I see Rosin, she is running really fast. So I do what most would do. I grab her in a hug and put my hand over her mouth so she doesn’t scream.  Her heart is pumping so fast. But so is mine. Suddenly, I hear the perpetraitor car and its roaring after us. “Hurry, Run.” I grab Rosin’s hand and try to pull her along. “i can’t make it.” Rosin says starting to slow down. Forgetting every grudge I’d ever felt I hoisted Rosin unto my back and ran the rest of the way. In front of us is the cave and on the other side is trees so thick not even a car can get through it. We crawl through the wall just in time. The perpurtraitor’s car screeches to a stop.

conversation

“OMG I’M so glad you are OK!” I hug ROsin tightly. As we sit there together everything falls back into balance again. Then I notice something. The sun is starting to rise over the trees looking like a bright orb. I look at my friend and smile. And she smiles back.

“OMG where are the girls have you seen them?” Ms Penny sat on the countertop. “Yes I woke up this morning to find..” There was a pause on the other side of the line as Smith came unto the phone. “Turn on the TV!” Phil stood there looking like a proud man. “THese 2 girls were found in the forests woods.” And just like that the world shifted back into balance

THe End.

Final draft creative writing peice : “Consequences”

Pictures\

“

“OMG I love fall!” I sit around the circular table drinking a low fat mocha with my 4 best friends. Currently, we are Located in Downtown Las’s Classy Shoppe, which has the best mochas in the whole world. It is a perfect day and the wind blows through the parallel doors blowing my frizzy hair. Alyssa, my best friend since 1st grade, winds her hand and leans forward on the table popping her gum. I already know that she is about to talk about her Halloween plans. Alyssa loves sharing so much that attention is her energy. Sure enough, she says “Carl and I are going to Fright night this weekend.” “NO way, me too!” My friend Hazel screams. All of a sudden, I find myself gazing off as my friends discuss costumes, guys, and their Halloween plans. Suddenly, the conversation bubbles to a silent cry. “What are you doing on Halloween?” Blue asks me, her red lipstick popping. Blue is another one of my best friends. She got her name in 5th grade when she decided to dye her blonde hair a blue color. Now, it is brunette, but she is obsessed with red lipstick. “I can’t go to fright night because my mom says it’s too far away.” I suddenly flash back to my mom yelling at me and the scared faces of my little sisters Zen and Patsy, who haven’t seen my mom yell since dad left. “Oh come on,” Hazel said shaking my arm. “It will be fun and there will be a lot of cute guys.” “But I already have a boyfriend.” I whine. “Oh come on… We all know that Charles is such a spoiler.” I sigh and take a deep breath. Did I really want to be a spoiler? It only takes one more second. “Ok, I will go.’’

Fright night is an event located on the top of Cherry Mountain on a golf course. There is said to be ghosts lurking everywhere but mostly there is just a lot of partying. I have been wanting to go to Fright night ever since 7th grade when I was too old to trick or treat but too young for high school parties. Still, I was afraid to ask because at that time my parents were always in some kind of fight or war. This time would be different. Now, with my dad out the house I did not have to worry anymore.

October 31

I stand in front of the mirror and I feel like crying. My face is beautiful. I am all made up in a long hazel coconut dress a pair of giant aviator sunglasses and 3 inch heels. However, through all of this, I know this is not the real me.” I am about to grab my jacket when my little sister Zen busts through the door almost making me crash to the floor. Her hair is frizzy and she looks excited as if she just won a pony at the fair. “You have a phone call!” I lean down and grab the classy phone, my hand still shaking from stress. “Hey Berry its Alyssa, are you ready?” I give myself one more glance and sigh. “Yeah I’m coming out.”

The kitchen is usually quiet and empty so I am surprised to see my mom cutting a pumpkin on the kitchen counter. “Hey Berry your friends are outside.” She says not turning around. “Oh yah, we are going out to eat today.” My mom is silent for a moment and I am so afraid she will turn around, see my outfit, and cancel my whole evening. I hear her lay down the knife and sigh. “Ok, be back by nine.” And with that I am out the door.

The moon is bright as I step into the red Maserati . “OMG I am glad you came!” Alyssa says kissing my cheek. I smile and squish between Blue. I am ready.

The mountain roads wind and as we descend into the hills I feel myself getting dizzy. We drive and drive for what seems like hours, not seeming to go anywhere. After about an hour Hazel looks up from her dictionary. “Where are we?” Porsche, the driver, is silent. I feel the quiet murmuring bubble to an end. “Honestly, I don’t know. The Gps doesn’t work up here so we could be going anywhere.” “WHAT!!!” I literally almost jump out of my seat. “SO we are lost in the dark on a mountaintop?” Hazel touches my arm in a way that makes me calm down. My heart stays beating out of my chest.  All of a sudden, I hear a blasting horn and the car slams to a stop, throwing a sleeping Blue into the car’s dark glass window. “What happened?” Alyssa asks, her calm demeanor clearly gone, “I think I just saw something glowing on the street. Porsche jumps out the car and opens the car door. Nervous, I climb atop Blue who is still snoring like a car horn, and look out the window. Porsche is holding a glowing object that has teeth. And suddenly it disappears into the night. “Did anyone else just see that?” I whisper scream to Alyssa? She nods and I know something weird is going on.

After what seems like forever, Porsche jumps back into the car, locking the doors behind her. “What did you see?” Hazel and I yell simultaneously. Porsche looks shaken. “There was this gnome and it left me a note. She hands me the shiny blue piece of paper. I scan the note quickly. “Keep going and you will be sorry.” And suddenly a light shines upon the car “Porsche I think we should…” it only takes a minute before the gas pedal is down and we are speeding up the mountain. 30 minutes ,of terse silence, later I yawn and look out the window. “Have we lost them?” Alyssa has been watching the windows, which used to be clear, fill with rain. “OMG I see another One!” “Another what?” But Porsche doesn’t answer because the road answers for us. Before I know it, we are off the road and tumbling down the mountain.

‘BEEP” “Hello my MS Mack, yes, I was wondering if you had contact with the girls.” Ms. Pumpkin rests on top the kitchen counter her dress falling below her knees,. “No they went out a while ago and they left their phones her with me.” The phone cascaded to a troublesome silence and MS Pumpkin felt dread creep into her skin. “I never should have let the girls go out.” With that she grabbed her car keys and the refrigerator magnet that read fright nights.

BOOM Boom with a crash the car came to a stop. I sit up and look around. I am no longer inside the comfy interior of the Porsche I am splayed on the squishy green grass of a “golf field?” I sit up abruptly and look over at the miles and miles of rolling green hills. Everything looks normal but the flags. Hanging there, are bodies. These bodies look fake but their proportions are too real. I step back and squish. Under my foot is the body of a gnome. It looks at me with its emerald green eyes and smiles. I scream.

My mom always told me to avoid pumpkins. She said that gnomes and pumpkins were the signs of the devil and that if ever encountered with one you should toss it into the nearest hole. I look at the gnome, Then I take it and throw it into the nearest golf club. Suddenly, I am engulfed in the green fields and in an underground cave.

“Hello? Anybody home?” I wake up to see that there are gnomes everywhere. And in my hand is a message.

here in this cave

will be your friends’ grave

if you’re not brave

you will surely cave

and die

under no one’s eyes

save your limbs before it’s too late

or  have yours and your friends be eaten by a snake.

I drop the note and take off running, Poomp, I run into something soft and squishy and I realize that it is a pumpkin. “Lookup.” It says. On top of the ceiling hanging like butterflies in a chrysalis are a million glass bottles. Each with what looks like a teddy bear in them.  “Why hello my darling.” I turn to see a giant mouse-like animal staring back at me. I feel my heart beating out of my chest. “Hi..” “I am your friend and I will help you with your mission.” I frown, my mouth falling open in disbelief. “How can you, help me?” The animal smiled, it’s sharp teeth dripping with moss?’” “These are my friends you know.” he reaches up to one bottle and wrenches it open. Out flies an animal like a mix between a moth and a butterfly. Suddenly I know this guy is my ally

“So why am I here? What do I do? How do I get out of here?” I gesture to the cave labeled with stalactites. “All good questions my dear. I am afraid that the people are in trouble everyday a new person gets hung outside on those long golf poles. And before you know it there will be no one else left. But you can save them.” The animal lifts my chin in his paw.  “OK but what is this about losing my limbs?” The bear sighs a long deep sigh. “Every time a new person comes they are introduced to the gnomes. These gnomes once touched, begin to take over the person’s body. And if they do not do what the gnome says they lose 1 limb. I do some quick calculating, “My friends will be hung in 24 hours!” the animal tends to the crackling fire and nods. “Unless you play and win 20 Halloween games with coordination cardio and win every one. You lose 4 and you get hung.” His green eyes glint. “Well that’s not too hard.” “Oh yeah, did I mention you will have the Argos Gnomes coming after you?” “What are those?”

All of a sudden, I got a picture of an ugly beast tall as a building with feet the size of 4 wheeler and whiskers long as 20 foot steel poles. “OK, this just got hard.”

Alyssa sat on the golf court. Everyone was there except for Berry. Haley, Blue and Alyssa sat dizzy but awake. “Where did Ber go?” Blue shrugged. Suddenly, out the air fell a gnome. Quickly and carefully, Hailey dissected the animal

play 30 holes and you will win

back the life of your old friend

with them you’ll earn bottles too

and save the life of me and you

‘But I don’t even know how to play golf. All of a sudden, golf clubs rained from the sky like candy. Along with instructions. Hailey stood on the court in front of the first hole and sighed. “I guess I better do this.” With that she launched the ball and it was caught by a fuzzy orange monster. “This may be harder than I thought.”

Berry

I stand in front of the wood door and sig. My breath is now coming in short breaths. Mouse animal told me to go to the man at the desk to try and get into the game. Before, i can knock a 2 foot woman will huge red hair and a squid tattoo smiles and welcomes me in.  I hear a crunch and realize with surprise that it is a skeleton. Heebie jeebies skitter up my arms. The wood desk is 20 times my height and the man behind it is even bigger. SO big that his stomach would fill another house. “Oh another human. Goodie!” He leans over his giant desk and looks upon me. I stand up on the chair they gave me. “I need to start the maze.” The man laughs so hard I am afraid rain drops would flow out his nostrils. “Now look here, HUMAN, I don’t give my key to just anyone. I believe you owe me something. Suddenly, a key materializes around my neck. “Give me the key.” I pick it up and inside I see colors like a rainbow.’ ‘These are the souls of all of your friends give it to me and you give me permission to have them forever if you lose.” i swear thunder rumbles outside. And just like that, I hand over the key. The games begin.

Bam! Out on the golf field thunder crackles like rice Krispy treats in your mouth. Just as the Alyssa made the move towards the pole, a tornado appeared sweeping time back.

Berry

I wake up in my bed. The purple comforter tickles my nose and Tommy my white bear is smiling at me. “Where am I?” I pick up my cell phone. To my surprise, the display reads November 30th. “Wow that was all a dream.” The wall phone rings interrupting my thoughts. “Hey Ber, its Haley are you going to Fright night?” Thoughts flash through my head like lightning bolts. “No thanks.” I swear the suns shines a little brighter.

What’s wrong with the hamburger? A curly haired girl said. “Its cigarettes.” I reply. This commercial caught my eye because when you first look at it looks like a hamburger. The author did a great job appealing to vision by making it look realistic. It appealed to Ethos because of the company logo at the bottom. Its name is Share the Air and it is a company that rally’s for safe air. I was not able to access the website on school Wi-Fi, but I know the company talks about their mission statement on the site. Also, because it is a real company people trust it more. It appeals to Pathos because it is a picture of something relatable. Most Americans like hamburgers so it was smart to use them to portray a certain idea. Also, it makes you feel sad for the hamburger. The food stinks logo also did a good deed in adding humor. Logos is the sentence at the bottom, “Secondhand smoke is ruining the experience for some of your guests. That’s costing you money. Learn more at Share Air.org.” That is facts of the whole matter.

The fire of the Starfish – travel piece Gabrielle Carter

Hey mom did you know that starfish sting even after they die? I pet a broken starfish and set it down in the mushy sand. We are in Florida, St Andrews Florida to be exact. The bay ripples in front of us like a bathtub that is being played in by a 2 year old and the sun shines behind the clouds. My mom rubs my arm. “It’s like the little starfish has a legacy, still stinging even after its time is long gone.” A moment of silence passes between us and a boat jets through the bay leaving a crisp wet spray. “Yeah, but maybe the journey is worth it.”
Life is a story waiting to be told
                                A story a story that will never get old
                                   The happy the sad the in between
                                    All these memories make me, me.
“Oh wow that is me!” …” Joseph Earl Carter sits in his creaky wheelchair, his wrinkled hands holding the medium sized iPad as he smiles into the camera. His childlike playfulness shows in his smile and his wrinkles. He is playfully unaware of the plague that was to come.

If there is one starfish to talk about it is Joseph Earl Carter. Stubborn, methodical, and strongly opinionated, he left his mark on the world. “He loves God.” Aunt Beola mentions. You could see this love of God in the wrinkles on his skin and in the whiteness in his smile. “Kids used to come to the house over the summer for devotion and it was always interesting.” My dad mentions. With his friendly demeanor and roaring Christianity Joseph Carter was known by most.
JEC (Joseph Earl Carter)) grew up in the small town of Ellisville Mississippi. (a town that is about 30 minutes from Laurel and an hour from Hattiesburg). He lived and thrived in a 4 bedroom 2 bathroom house with his 14 kids and his wife Iola. All of his kids worked on the backyard farm and tended to the many plants and animals which included pigs, a couple of dogs, and a horse named Cricket. Hard work and Jesus were evident in every part of his life. The devastating part of Joseph’s life came when he lost 2 previous wives (at separate times) to cancer. Still, he kept farming and a few years later he met Iola Carter. Together they built a legacy that lasted. Love.
 

                                                                              News

Honey, we have some bad news. I look up from my sketchbook which is scrawled with questions. It is midafternoon and our family of 6 is squished together in our blue Toyota Sienna. We are about to head down to St Andrews, Florida. “Your grandfather is sick.” I pause midsentence and drop my pen down on my page. “What do you mean?” Silence fills the air and all conversations come to an abrupt end.” He is old and he may not make it.” I listen blindly as my dad explains that my grandpa has colon cancer among other problems. When they finish I whisper “ I have to ask him my interview questions.” My mom lets out a deep sigh. “Sorry honey you may not have time to.” The words echo in my mind. “You may not have time to.”
I whistle to the melody of the radio and tap my foot. We are on our way to Alabama to see my grandmother. Then, after that we would be heading to St Andrews State Park. I look at my questions and smile. My dad is at the wheel talking to my mom. “Hey dad, I am going to write a book about Grandpa.” My dad yawns and smiles. “That’s my girl.” I did not know what would happen next. So I was surprised when, 4 days later I receive the news. I might not have time to ask him the questions.
Life goes in a never ending circle. Birth to toddler, toddler to kid, kid to teen, and teen to adult. Through your journey of life you may face troubles. Hyperthyroidism, relationship problems, and family issues. Still, life continues like a TV show that goes on through the sad and parts. Every trip and event in life is a roller-coaster ride, up and down. Finally, there comes a day when the rollercoaster comes to an end. Sometimes a surprise, sometimes not.
“He didn’t make it.” I am frozen in surprise. As of now, I am standing in front of the tent in my white starfish tee-shirt and pink pajama pants. A boatload of feelings wash over me like a flood. My heart tells me to run, so I do. I jet to the camp showers and explode into tears letting the hot water run down my back feeling the pain wash away. When it is all over I feel empty.
In life there are two types of people, glass half empty people and glass half full people. However, when you lose someone you love all of those stereotypes wash away. There were 3 things that got me through the toughest moment of my life. Family, music, and time.
Family Fire
“And then her pants fell down!” Noise and smells float into the crisp night air. For once, no one is crying and everyone is laughing. It is a day after the funeral and a warm fuzzy feeling hugs me like a warm sweater. I listen to the hilarious story of how my aunt lost her pants at an audition and think about how the legacy would continue through this story. Suddenly, one of my uncles claps his hands. “Who wants to share stories about Grandpa we want his legacy to be remembered.” In the circle of life there is life and there is death but in the middle is a 3rd circle. It is something not everyone has but is important all the same. It’s called aa legacy. A legacy is like a firer that keeps blazing even after it burns out.
  A new legacy
It Is January 15 2014 the birth of a new year and now the birth of a new gift. The gift is tiny and lets out a cry as the tired mother holds him in her arms. “He is beautiful.” The dad nods. This was his 4th time doing this. “Let’s name him.” Suddenly, the clock strikes 3:33. “How about “Nathan Joseph?” Dad leans down and touches the baby’s foot. “It is perfect.” His name was the fire and sting of the starfish.
Anastasia State park 2015
RRRRRSSHHHH… The rush of the water kissing the sand carries through the beach. 2 year old Nathan runs around the beach soaked from swimming in the ocean. I stand on the beach picking up shells when suddenly my mom and brother come racing towards me from the other direction. “Look what we found?” Josiah hands me a beautifully sculpted starfish. Its middle is purple like grape dye. I look to the sky and wink. “It is just like grandpa.”

Gabrielle Carter’s article review (sorry boxes got lost in translation)

Date:September 8 _______________
Sager- Honors Advanced Composition

Title & Author of Article:
In a sunburned country
Summary of article:
Australia is a place that loses a prime minister and that is so vast and empty that a band of amateur enthusiasts could conceivably set off the world’s first nongovernmental atomic bomb on its mainland and almost four years would pass before anyone noticed.* Australia is sixth largest country and its largest island. Still, people don’t know about Australia
this author uses details about Australia to explain that people don’t get to know it enough. He elaborates on this comment by adding the details about the newspaper stories. Most of all, he is just trying to explain that we should explore our “cousins down under” more often then we do. His last sentence says it all “You take my point again, I’m sure. This is a country that is at once staggeringly empty and yet packed with stuff. Interesting stuff, ancient stuff, stuff not readily explained. Stuff yet to be found.
Trust me, this is an interesting place.”

Lede:
Flying into Australia, I realized with a sigh that I had forgotten again who their prime minister is. I am forever doing this with the Australian prime minister—committing the name to memory, forgetting it (generally more or less instantly), then feeling terribly guilty. My thinking is that there ought to be one person outside Australia who knows.
Examples of color/background:
I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister, Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into the surf and vanished.
-we pay shamefully scant attention to our dear cousins Down Under—
Its sports are of little interest to us and the last television series it made that we watched with avidity was Skippy.
the Times ran 20 articles that were predominantly on or about Australian affairs. In the same period, for purposes of comparison, the Times ran 120 articles on Peru, 150 or so on Albania and a similar number on Cambodia, more than 300 on each of the Koreas, and well over 500 on Israel
Put in the crudest terms, Australia was slightly more important to us in 1997 than bananas, but not nearly as important as ice cream.
Theme
Australia is a land that needs to be explored

Three most important quotes (and why):
scientists were seriously investigating the possibility that a mysterious seismic disturbance in the remote Australian outback almost four years earlier had been a nuclear explosion set off by members of the Japanese doomsday cult Aum Shinrikyo. ( he spends another 2-3 paragraphs explaining this seismic disruption)
You take my point, of course. This is a country that loses a prime minister and that is so vast and empty that a band of amateur enthusiasts could conceivably set off the world’s first nongovernmental atomic bomb on its mainland and almost four years would pass before anyone noticed.* Clearly this is a place worth getting to know. (following sentences talk about getting to know australia.”)
invented and mastered ocean- going craft at least 30,000 years in advance of anyone else, ( because they invented this craft in came arrival of Captain James Cook.

Reflection: How effective was this article in explaining its thematic focus? How did this article affect you negatively or positively? What was its purpose and was the author effective in his/her purpose?
The author did an amazing job establishing his purpous. I like how he called Australia our cousins down under and then said other states outstripped Australia. it made sense that Australia is our cousin down under but it can sound funny together. Then, I liked how he said that there were many things that could kill you. Mostly, I loved how unified his theme was.
The author effected me positively because it made me curious about Australian affairs.
The author’s purpous was to inform and persuade. He was informing you about Australia and all it has to offer. He did this by establishing his theme. Then he persuaded you to look up and or visit Australia.
Title & Author of Article:
Excuse us while we kiss the sky
Summary of article: This story had a different story than I thought from the title. It was actually about a group of explorers who got together after the death of explorer Matthew Powers. This group made of Helen, Mark, and Luca explored catacombs ancient places and even the Manhattan Bridge. Then one night, Garrett gets caught for exploring the World War 2 bomb shelter. Supposedly, they broke inn and spent hours rummaging through boxes and boxes of bank documents and legal documents. Eventually, Garrett is let go because police found nothing related to break ins in Garret’s house. Overall, this story is about a passionate group of explorers that came together over death.

Lede:Editor’s Note: On March 10, 2014, journalist Matthew Power lost his life pursuing a story along the Nile River in Uganda. He left behind a body of work as diverse and compelling as the adventures, tragedies, and passions of his subjects. To honor Matt—and to encourage young writers to pursue new stories—the Matthew Power Literary Reporting Award at the Arthur L. Carter Journalism Institute of New York University has been established. A generous anonymous donor has offered to match all gifts contributed to the endowment, up to a total of $50,000, between now and October 22—what would have been Matt’s 40th birthday.

Examples of color/background:
The 747 touched down and taxied, its passengers cramped and bleary after the thirteen-hour flight.
An officer gripped each arm, and they led him down the aisle, past scores of wide-eyed passengers. In first class, former British prime minister Gordon Brown was furious over the delay.
Garrett scarcely looks the part of an academic, neither tweedy nor fusty. Thirty-two years old, with a trimmed goatee and a mop of straight brown hair hanging over black plastic frames,
There was some dismay that a city investing well over $1 billion on security in the run-up to the Olympics would be caught off guard so easily.
“The primary hobby in England is getting absolutely fucked and getting into a fight, or dressing like a hooker and wandering the streets.” Why should an activity as wholesome as Urbex be criminalized?
Thematic focus:
Keep exploring when things go wrong

Three most important quotes (and why):
“He hasn’t been banned from exploring,” clarified Explo, whose French-and-Cockney-inflected English lent itself well to one-liners. “He’s been banned from getting caught.” (because if he is caught again he will be arrested, good example of color!!!)
Fuck,” he muttered, running his fingers through his hair and pacing around the tiny studio as if caged. His passport, of course, was now in the hands of the British authorities. ( now that his passport is gone he cannot go outside the country without trouble.)
By midnight, five of us were cruising through the streets of South London in a cartoonishly tiny Renault Twingo dubbed “The Twinkie,” the GPS pre-programmed with the locations of dozens of manholes and Tube stations (he is risking getting caught.)
Reflection: How effective was this article in expressing its thematic focus? How did this article affect you negatively or positively? What was its purpose and was the author effective in his/her purpose?
The author did an excellent job explaining his focus. This is most evident when says ”
“No way,” he said, looking up from the wreckage around him with a grin. “I’m doubling down.”
By midnight, five of us were cruising through the streets of South London in a cartoonishly tiny Renault Twingo dubbed “The Twinkie,” the GPS preprogrammed with the locations of dozens of manholes and Tube stations.”
He says this after he gets caught exploring. This shows that he is a really tenacious .
 This article did not really effect me much. It showed that exploration is good.
The author’s purpous was to inform us about exploration and about feats of these explorers.

Title & Author of Article: Steven Rinella
Dream Acres
Summary of article:
This amazing story is about a dude and his brother and Dan who live in a little shack in Saltery Cove. They bought this beat down run down shack with a deck that seems like if they added any people, it would collapse. At first people were like why you would buy such a beat up shack.
Steven Rinella does a good job explaining their journey and how much fun they had with the learning to navigate the labyrinthine networks of straits and fjords and islands that stretched for watery miles away from our place. They eventually got comfortable and invite some peeeee
Friends to come see them and even married aa couple there. The author did a great job explaining both the positive and the negative in an
Entertaining way that did not seem like a list.
Lede: My two brothers and I, along with a buddy of ours named Dan Bogan, own a shack at a place called Saltery Cove on Southeast Alaska’s Prince of Wales Island. The shack is about 36 feet long and 12 feet wide, with the warped shape and discoloration of a cardboard shoe box that’s been soaked in the rain.

Examples of color/background: warped shape and discoloration of a cardboard shoe box that’s been soaked in the rain,

the front deck sits about seven feet above the shoreline on wooden pilings that are in various stages of decay.

Surrounded largely by the Tongass National Forest, it’s a place where black bears gnaw mussels from the rocks in what might be described as our yard and killer whales pass by so close that you can hear them even with the door closed.

living in a short-term rental that sat so close to the water, I could watch movies in my living room at night while holding a fishing rod baited for eels and cast into the bay.

Thematic focus: One or two people can turn a mess into something beautiful. Being in nature can bring people together.

Three most important quotes (and why):

My usual, flippant reply is that real estate cliché about location, location, location. – This explains why  he chose to live in such a run down little shack.

Saltery Cove is a place where everything—the weather, the ocean, the mountains, the people, the trees, the animals, even the buildings—seems capable of kicking your ass in a very physical way. -this is second reason why hed put self through such torture

. After dinner, we went down to the shoreline and watched the light fade. We’d been married a year at that point. Something about the experience—maybe the air, maybe the wine, maybe the residue of hopefulness left over from a day of fishing—caused her to say that she was ready to have a baby so long as I was up for it. – being in nature can bring people together

Final draft

Gabrielle Carter

Mr. Sager

Language  

Interview essay 1

interviwee Kimmy Wang

                                             Chinese people do not eat dogs

     

     The fat moon rises, silent as a ghost, over the bustling city as cheerful music fills the brisk night air. “Mommy what is that?” A little girl with jet black pigtails points to a humongous red dragon that opens and closes its chompers looking for its next meal. The tassels swing from its tail like mini swings and the green paper horns dance in the moonlight. Walking in front of the 600 foot dragon march people of all ages bearing lanterns the color of christmas candy. “That’s the silk Dragon, it’s a tradition around here.” Ms W leans down and hoists the small girl up on her shoulders. This is the first New Years celebration for 2 year old Kimmy who could not be more excited. She continues to bounce up and down in her green and red kimono which matches the green and red lanterns perfectly. Suddenly, the parade comes to a perfect halt. Prime Minister San raises his beautiful red cup. The crowd follows like graceful flocks of birds. “I propose a toast to good luck, character, and a New year.” The people raised their cups. “To china.”

 

    Chinese New year is the most socially and economically important holiday in China. It is a time where families gather together to clean, eat, celebrate, and even offer sacrifices. What Kimmy was experiencing her first New Year’s celebration. During the time before this festival, houses are cleaned to get rid of the ghosts that may have been in the houses.Then, decorations are hung. Decor for this festival includes lanterns, poems, and red envelopes stuffed with lucky money. The color red is the backbone of this ceremony and symbolizes fire. Also included in this 14- day celebration, is the dragon dance. The dragon is made of silk or paper that dances down the street. Men carry the tail and head of the dragon so it doesn’t fall down.  The best part of Chinese New Year for Kimmy, was experiencing ,was something you could get in few other places, love.

 

    Kimmy Wang grew up in China with tall buildings, nice kids, and rice balls as her companions. In fact, if she had 3 words to describe her childhood they would be sweet, nice, and happy. She spent most of her time with her grandparents who treated her like a queen. In fact, she did not even have to work until the age of  9 when she moved to America for school. “Sometimes I wish I could back to my childhood.” Kimmy remarks sighing. I write this down and reflect back to my own childhood. It was a nice one of a normal girl until the age of…. “ Hey Gabby are you still there?” Kimmy asks taking my moment of silence as inattention.“Oh yeah I know what you mean sometimes I wish I could go back too. To childhood.”

 

       Childhood memories are a divine gift from God. They show us where we have been and where we are now. When Kimmy was asked about her favorite memory she described a time when everything was sweet. “It was a sunny day when we got a knock on the door. I remember dashing to the door and practically jumping with excitement. For there, standing in the doorway was Big Brother (actually a cousin) holding a giant bag from the supermarket.” “What you got What you got!” I yelled, Big brother smiles and hoists me up into his arms. “Today we are making candy.” My grandmother smiles and punches brother on the arm. She has a smudge on her grandmother apron, a sign she has been preparing. “OOh Kimmy you are going to love this.” We follow her into the kitchen where colorful bowls rest on bamboo mats. For a couple of hours I watched as my brother made tooth candy. I was mesmerized by the whole process,my favorite part was seeing the magic color changing ingredient. Finally the candy process was done and we cooked the candy. Then, after 30 minutes of royal cooking a heavenly smell shot out the oven and permeates the room. The candy was ready. “I didn’t even wash my hands, I just ate it right off the stick.” I pause. “So, How was it?” Kimmy sighs. “It was pure heaven.\

 

       There are many different candies ranging from chocolate to gummy sweets. It is funny how ,unlike the United States, China is not known for its overly sweet candies. Instead, they are known for candies like Silver Girl Lychee candy, a translucent white drop that is not very sweet, but includes a slight banana flavor. Here are some of the most interesting candies I found. One, is called spicy peanuts. It is a Chinese snack that is peanuts chilies and peppercorns, making it really spicy. The second is a candy called Garden Lucky candy. This one is a strawberry candy given out on New Years. It is said that by getting to the center you are promised good luck. Overall, candies are important in Chinese culture.

 

       Unfortunately, Kimmy moved away from China at the age of 5. “I was so angry and devastated.My greatest fear was being alone and in the dark, and I was afraid that in New York I would be eaten alive by a monster.” I laugh and tap my pen on a  notebook. “So did it work out?” “Well,New York was Ok but I missed  China.” “So what was your favorite part of New York?” Kimmy pauses. “Well there were the buildings, the people, the wonderful boutiques and the food was so amazing. Overall, China-town was my favorite.”

 

         “Chinatown was one of those places that had everything shops, food malls and even, a dentist.” “A dentist? That is so weird for a place like that” I quickly write down this fact. “I hated going there because I had to get a tooth removed and they stuck a needle in my gums! It was one of those things to put me to sleep.”  “Wow I bet your teeth were sore after that.” “Yeah they were but the food was soo good.” “What kind of food did they have?” I ask, quickly switching gears to the food. “They had the usual like ramen and tai chi but they also had specialties like rice balls, dragon tai cakes, and even dumplings. Their dumplings were the best.” I hear a pause in Kimmy’s voice and continue. I use this pause to move subjects. “SO what else did you do in New York besides CHinatown?” “Most of time I just played with the kids around the area. So was that when you learned chinese, in New York?” Suddenly, Kimmy pauses and suddenly her voice goes into panic mode. “Wait, you aren’t writing down everything I say are you?” I look at my pages of sprawling notes that crawl across the page like chicken scratch. “Um…. Sort of.” I touch my head, wondering if this interview was a good idea in the first place. “You don’t have a problem with me writing things down do you?” “Well I just don’t want people to think bad things about me..” And suddenly she goes back and tells me what to not put into the paper. I quickly put a line through my notes and circle the important things. Finally, I am done. “Hey are you ready to tell me how you learned Chinese?” Kimmy pauses. “I’m ready.”

 

       “Ok so here is the truth about how I learned Chinese, I am self taught.” There is a dramatic pause as Kimmy waits for my reaction. “So, your parents didn’t help you learn the language?” “Well…. they did but mostly I learned from tv.” I suddenly think back to my spanish 2 classes. They expected us to learn grammar first and, to this day the only Spanish words I know are Puedo ir al bano and hola. I switch back to the conversation. “That is a great accomplishment! I tried learning Spanish on my own I failed miserably.” Kimmy laughs with relief. “When I tell people that I learned Chinese by myself some say I have some sort of bad luck.” “Wait? Why do they say that?” Kimmy yawned and I heard her lay down the phone. “I guess its just a stereotype//.” “Tell me more.” I say.

 

      Stereotypes have been part of the Chinese culture since the colony was discovered. I am sure you have heard of some of them. If not, here are some good examples. number one, all Chinese people look the same.” This stereotype is dumb because that is like saying all black people look the same. Another one is that all Chinese know Karate. Unfortunately, not every Chinese baby is taught karate at a young age. Otherwise, they would be able to kick away the hate. When I originally asked my friend this question I expected to get a generic answer. The answer she gave me is worthy enough to make a whole essay on stereotypes. So here it is.

       “I hate it when people say Chinese people eat dogs.”  “What!” I yell in surprise and horror and quickly scribble down a note. “So why would they think that?” Kimmy sghs depressingly. “I don’t know, but just because some chinese people eat dogs doesn’t mean that we do.” I swallow my horror. “So where did that come from and how come I never heard of it before?” I heard the opening of a link as Kimmy opened her computer. “I think there was a festival where people ate dogs.” I gulp. “That is so gross!” “I know right, I would never do that. I love dogs.” Kimmy says closing down her computer.“But that’s not the only stereotype there are so many others too. Chinese people are smart Chinese people know karate blah blah blah. Sometimes I wish people would get to know us better.” “Yeah I know what you mean.”

 

           Chinese people DO EAT DOGS. At least, they used to. The ancient tradition began a time ago when people killed barking dogs and fed them to hungry army soldiers. From this event, stemmed the idea of the Junhu Hotou dog eating festival. This horrible festival was one to celebrate the death of dogs. People stood and watched as dogs were led out their cages and were slaughtered. Everywhere you would see dogs. There were cooked ones, ones on sale, and ones in peoples picnic baskets. It became a normality celebrated annually. It was said that eating dogs was proved to bring good luck and prosperity.Then, in 2011 the governor cancelled the dog eating festival due to complaints from certain animal activists. Still this stereotype resonates. SO here is the question. Do Chinese people eat dogs today? Or just because the festival was cancelled, are dogs still on the market? To prompt your emotions here are pictures of the festival.

 

A dog is caged before slaughter in china

 

dogs on sale at the dog eating festival 😦

 “Hey Gabbi, is that all.” “Yes ,Kimmy, thank you so much for your help, I learned a lot.about the chinese culture from this.” I lay the phone on my bed and hang up. It is funny how much you do not know about someone until you talk to them. I didn’t know that Kimmy moved from China at the age of 5 or that there was a such thing as a paper dragon that danced the new year until the interview, and and I talk to her everyday. So, if you don’t take anything else from essay I ask that you interview your friends. Ask them about their childhood or thier weekend. The truth is, by finding out who they are you may find out who you are.

Conclusion

Overall, I learned so much about writing from this book. I love how Zinsser used language that was very easy to understand to explain things that can transform your writing from good to better. It was a very intelligent idea considering how he was writing about people like you and me who no longer talk in extra long cluttered sentences. Here are some things that I learned. Number one, I learned that when writing memoirs you should not be afraid to tell people about yourself. If you let your real self shine you’d be surprised. I also learned that sometimes humorous writing isn’t about Steve Harvey (his humor). It may be humorous in an ironic way. Most of all, I learned that writing doesn’t come naturally to everyone but anyone can be a good writer regardless of whether you are a scientist, journalist, or sportsman. In fact Zinsser said that when he was a kid he never thought he would be an author. Especially, not an author.

Thank you for recommending this book

Gabrielle.

Humor.

I wasn’t sure what to write so I decided to summarize the paragraph. Humor is talking about how sometimes to be funny you have to be serious. At first, this did not make sense to me. Then, I figured out that  sometimes humor is not hah ha funny. Sometimes it is funny because it is ironic. Making the reader smile (like in Mehitabel’s meeting with a cat) is a way to get  the reader to keep reading.

Writing about the arts

The rhythmic banging of the instruments echoes throughout the stuffy stadium. I lean back in my chair and watch as the ballerinas do perfect spinoffs on their worn in ballet shoes. Still, I can tell a critical piece of the dance is missing. A piece that makes the puzzle feel incomplete. Then, I see it the lighting is casting a strange blue glow across the stage making the whole dance seem like a scene from an alien movie.. Suddenly, the lights go down and the banging music, a sideshow really, stops and the curtains close. The audience is on their feet begging for more.

The Cirque de Sire is a beautiful technical play held by the graceful swans of life. The plot dances through the scenes of time ending with an epic finale. However, you should avoid this show if you dislike aliens because though the dancing was pretty the light cast an eerie green glow on the stage. This made it seem like a dollar movie you see on TV.

Sports

Maghongy Wright has the ball he swivels around Pitman Robberts and “GOAL!!! GOALL GOAAL.” Brazil beats Cubs 13-8. “Man I remember that moment.” I lay back I the cushioned seat and twist my finger around my hair. “What did it feel like to be the greater soccer player in the US and earn more goals than any other player in the league.” Mahogony leaned forward on his knees and smiles. “It feels just like my grandmother said before she diied. “The dream accomplished is sweet as chocolate and peanut butter.” He took out a REECES piece and popped it in his mouth. “MM pure victory.”